It's hugely interesting to me that most of the damage you anticipate in your man/boy sex analysis comes from social attiudes and reactions to the sex... rather than from the sex itself.

You even seem to imply that much of that reaction is based on inaccurate perceptions of the situation. EG: "You only used him as a sex toy".

If I strip away the social pressure, misunderstand and reaction from your costs list all I'm pretty much left with is: maybe he only concented to please me, and it may cause him to question his sexuality (which even that wouldn't be such a problem if if weren't for negative social attitude). And unless he really hated the sex in his consenting to please, those risks seem pretty minor to me in the scheme of things.

Now, as you say, the presence of these reactions/attitudes in society alone may be reason enough to not risk the sex but...

How can we as boylovers support these attitudes!

I come back to my original point. We have to be careful not to get swept up in the extremist attitudes of either side. And especially that we don't swing in the "all sex is harmful" direction reacting against the "all boys want sex" attitudes. As long as these "all sex is harmful" attitudes are in place even my NON-SEXUAL relationships with my yfs will be viewed with suspicion and mistrust by other adults... heck you guys know that it's getting so you can't even touch kids any more without fear of finger pointing.

Protect your yf from these attitudes by all means... but please don't cast us in the mould of "mollesters" and "rapists" because WE as much as anyone, need to know that we are not those things - EVEN if we have had loving or harmless sexual relationships with boys.... or perhaps more relevant to most of us here... EVEN if we longingly DREAM of having sexual relationships with boys.... and EVEN if we work (for the honour of God) to subordinate our sexaul focus on the boys we love so that we can love them well as friends, teachers, mentors and parents.

Blessings
Cat.