Hi Cat,

How fantasy and masturbation fit into this third option is my ongoing exploration.

As I have mentioned, I don't have fantasies ('cause of how my brain seems to be wired), but I do desire to understand the issue. And, for me, it is also an ongoing exploration (of understanding, if not personal experience). I don't claim to have the answers -- just trying to work it through.

If we say that any fantasy about stuff that would be unholy if we actually did it was wrong... then pretty much throw out every fiction book and movie that has been produced in modern times.

Bringing up movies and books adds an interesting twist to the issue. I hadn't thought of that. OK, let me try and respond: Maybe the issue is what is in our hearts when we fantasize/imagine something that is unlawful/immoral. Say, for example, a movie depicts a rape. What is the director trying to do with that scene? Is he "getting off" on depicting the violent degradation of a woman, or is he trying to honestly depict a reality of our broken, sinful world? If the former, I'd say it's wrong (i.e. he is sinning, though it is possible watching the movie itself would not be sin for everyone); if the latter, it's probably not wrong. Same thing for the audience: If I rent a movie because I want to see some violent or sexual content, because I have that type of craving in my heart, it's probably wrong. But if I rent the movie with holy motives, and because I value art that portrays life in a realistic, truthful way, it's probably not wrong. Thoughts?

As I see it, fantasizing about sex with a boy is something your heart craves, and even if you would never actually do so in practice, to do so in your mind is probably not much different from God's perspective. Jesus did say that to commit adultery in one's heart (no real-life action involved!) is the same as doing so in practice. Would this not be a similar situation?

I appreciate the discussion and feedback.

Blessings,
Rainboy