Habit stronger than love? Did you really say that?

I don't believe anything at all is stronger than love. Certainly not the love of God which is spread abroad in our heart by the Holy Spirit.

I do not beleive in "free will".

I am what I am, however I got to be this way. Every thing I do is tainted by sin.

I don't believe it's sinful to BE a boylover. I belive that my boyloving is tainted by sin. This means that some aspects of it will be good and pure and holy and others will be corrupted and sinful and some will be a bit of both at the same time. If I was not a boylover, then I'd be in exactly the same situation with the taint of sin whatever my sexuality was.

I don't believe God will take away our sexuality.

What I "struggle" against is bad habits, and the temptation to give in to sinful behaviors. This I try and do by the power of the Holy Spirit... becuase it's certain that "without Him I can do nothing" (John 15). I don't do this because of any virtue in myself(some nobel desire of some illusionary hunger for good in me) I do it because God Himself convicts me, empowers and encourages me. Sure I have to put in the fervent effort, but I can only do it in relationship with my Father. As soon as He's out of the immediate picture I will fail.
No ammount of commitment, effort, promise, resolution, determination, practice etc... on my part will help me overcome any sin. My natural man LOVES sin and would rather seek pleasure than any other thing. Fortunately we have a Father who does not leave us in this helpless state but puts in us HIS OWN SPIRIT... by whom we "put to death the deeds of the body and live" (Rom 8).

God loves us so very much just as we are. He is your Father who wants your joy and blessing. He doesn't want you beating yourself up trying to be something you cannot be (ie: asexual). Rest in Him with gratitude. Pursue holliness in LOVE.

Blessings
Cat.