I don't think there is anyone here who can say he hasn't felt completely overwelmed by the cards he has been dealt in life. I know I have. I remember driving my car around one day, not even caring where I was going (or how fast, or what traffic laws I was breaking...not a good thing to do...), screaming at God at the top of my lungs. "Why did you do this to me??!!!" I had tears running down my cheeks and I'm sure it was not a good thing to see. But you know what? God didn't come down out of the clouds and answer me like I wanted him to, and even expected him to. No, he just let me figure it out on my own...and I am still figuring it out. I think the whole idea is that we DO figure it out. But at least we don't have to do it alone. We have each other. So I'm glad you found us and are reaching out for help.

From what I know about God, He has no intention of torturing us. If we are being tortured, it is the evil one doing it, not Him. I trully feel for you...I really do. But I know that God has a good answer for you, just as He has for every one of us. So please just keep searching and don't give up on God, He really does love you and cares about you.

Oh, by the way...I'm a hopeless romantic too. I think it's even worse for people like us.