Christian BoyLove Forum #65447
I appreciate your thoughts.
I intend on playing it safe, don't worry. I have never had to test my willpower from a kid coming onto me, but I feel like I would have enough self-respect (in the sense of not putting myself in a situation that could get me accused of abuse or whatever) to say, "No." Generally when I see this 14yo it's during a function where there are lots of other kids, too.
Our church is welcoming of all people from all walks of life. We have a gay couple who attends our church and they participate and serve with everyone else. Our church will say that acting out on homosexual temptations is sin (along with a whole host of other sins), but we're welcoming of sinners regardless. I very much agree with our stance on these issues.
Unfortunately, "guy culture" is prevalent among these adolescents and being manly is of utmost importance. They goof around with each other a lot, some are more willing to be "undignified" than others. Part of the allure of this 14yo is he really still has the young boyish features of a 12yo and the wild personality of a 12yo but he's just a bit lanky now, with some armpit air. As awkward as he looks with his oversized features I find him quite adorable... anyways...
When I think about my relationship with this boy in context, I think very little of these recent comments he's made, because we've always had this goofy relationship. But, then again, it ramped up in recent months and the comments have become more romantically suggestive. Which in context could be construed to mean he does have these kids of feelings in return. Who knows. If it's any consolation, he has had girlfriends in the past. Even the girls think he's a cutie. But now that I think about it, he's rarely really physical with them (not even hugging or holding hands). I didn't even do this on purpose but I joked with him that he shows me more affection than he shows his girlfriend.
I have a respectable relationship with his parents and if the boy were to ever make an advance, I believe I could go to them and say so, for the purpose of being open with them, not trying to hide it, and protecting myself. But I don't think he will. At least I hope he doesn't.