Christian BoyLove Forum #65289

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Re: seeking advice

Posted by Blackstone on 2012-05-13 16:22:33, Sunday
In reply to seeking advice posted by marc on 2012-05-12 17:03:04, Saturday

I've been in that situation. I think how the relationship progresses going forward is going to depend on the kind of relationship you have and what you do from now on. I can't speak to your relationship because I know nothing about it. Some people use the term YF very loosely and call any boy they know a YF, whereas others reserve the term for only those who are at least best friends. What level of friendship you had with him is going to make a difference in how it continues going forward.

In my case, we valued each other enough that our relationship has survived. I try to see him a few times a year and although I don't see him as often as I used to, the time we do get to spend together is more valuable.

The key to keeping it going is to stay connected. Luckily, staying connected is incredibly easy in this day and age. Chances are your YF is in multiple social networks already including some mixture of: Facebook, Xbox Live, PSN, Steam, Twitter. Join him in some of those networks. Add him as a Facebook friend, get one of the games he plays on Xbox Live, PSN, or Steam and play with him. Also, take advantage of your phones, text each other, or if you have to pay for texts get a free texting app like: Google Voice, GroupMe, or WhatsApp; or maybe use a voice messaging app like Voxer.

With all of these options, it's easy to get carried away and want to focus all of your time on staying in touch with him, but that's a good way of pushing him away, that's not what it is about. It's more about having many options for interaction and using them as appropriate. If you have some free time on a Friday night and no other plans, sending him a text saying "wanna play Call of Duty?" and then joining him on PSN or Xbox Live if he's up for it is a great way to stay in touch. With all the modern technologies, out of sight doesn't have to mean out of mind.

A decade or two ago I would have said it had to come to an end some day. But I don't think that is true anymore. Technology has reached the point where it doesn't have to end. It will change, yes; and another boy will one day come into your life to take the place your current YF once did. But that doesn't mean you don't stay in touch with him.

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