whether a relationship is gay or not is just not the point. relationships are everything and the only way forward and I am not talking sexual relationships necessarily. there are many types of relationship and, if they are real, will involve you at all sorts of different levels. The main thing is not to run away from someone just because you find them attractive and, if your 'shrink' ever suggests that you do, then I suggest thats it time to run away from him.
being gay is, i agree, a disadvantage in a straighter than straight society rather in the way that being lefthanded is in a righthanded world but a disability? thats just melodrama.