first: you aint wrong! (and I think you already know that deep down) love is everything and your friend is helping you to find this out . . . even though he doesn't know it.
hang in there, the dialogue is going on - but all the capital letters show that you are shouting inside yourself which makes it just hard for God to show you what He is planning for you . . so fight to stay calm! Ask all the questions but don't try to answer them yourself: let Him do that and that takes time - He never hurries. . . oh, and don't worry if noone around seems to have a clue about any of it: that's nearly always the way for us . . . isn't there anyone you can chat to though?