Hi Rainboy,

Didn't think your post was too negative at all.
Liked what you said :)

I agree with this mentor/brother/father role thing you say.

In my culture cuddling sons and friends is much more practiced and accepted. I still cuddle my 17 and 18 yo sons (even in public!) and they cuddle their male and female friends. So I don't see cuddling a boy "friend" like that to be inappropriate.

As to the romance side...
See here's the thing with me.
When I first thought my marriage was over (cause my wife kept saying "this will never work, its definitely over") I let myself fall in love with a boy.

The seeds where there and I guess I just gave in to them. I've never done that before since I've been married. Though there have been boys I could have fallen in love with (other seeds).

But I find, now that it's happened there's no falling out of love.
Of course I know that I can never have romance with this boy. But that's fine with me. If I can just be a friend and mentor to him that's more than enough.

"In my opinion, it's a LOT LESS PAINFUL to not even go down that road."
I couldn't disagree with this more!!!
Being in love whilst definitely painful is also the most amazing experience in life.
I could make things worse by trying and wishing for more than I can have in this relationship. That would be stupid.
But feeling the pain and joy of being in love whilst keeping this relationship in a healthy place... definitely a road worth walking on.

Blessings
Cat.