I think there IS a BL lifestyle and it comes with options. Which options you take will be as varied as there are boylovers.

Some options I'd consider holy others not.

Options would include:
Chatting online to other BLs either via forums, instant messaging or emails.
Volunteering as a mod on a BL forum.
Creating a BL related blog.
Looking at boy media, whether in Hollywood or international movies, literature, sports, music or on the net (some of it legal some not).
Sharing pics with other BLs (either legal or not).
Meeting secretly with other BLs (secretly in the sense that other people don't know you are a gathering of Bls).
Getting involved in lobbying for social/political change.
Seeking to educate others to the realities of BL (as opposed to the social misconceptions).
Having a yf.
Working with kids for fun or profit (ie:your job) or ministry.
Pursuing sexual relationships with boys (either casually or as part of an ongoing af/yf relationship).
Getting married and having kids (I include this as an option because it certainly gives you heaps of exposure to kids - both your own and their friends - and because it puts some other BL issues into a relative perspective).
Seeking to offer support and education (and ministry) to other BLs.

There's probably a lot more that could be added...

I believe that within these options it's quite possible to live a holy BL lifestyle. I do and I'm not ashamed of it. When I'm tempted to engage with the less holy lifestyle aspects I try and get help from my other Christian BL friends and brothers to resist. So the appeal of the more sexual elements is always there. I'm not going to judge any non-Christian BL for the lifestyle options he chooses, and I wouldn't necessarily disassociate my self from them (unless the temptation to join in their unholy habits was causing me to stumble). As Christians I think it's essential we seek to live holy... but I know that it can be a struggle to do that at times. I'm not going to condemn anyone who is struggling, but I would not be able to endorse a brother's lifestyle that said sexing a boy was ok as a Christian.

Blessings
Cat.