I'm a succer to the whims and whiles of my yfs. But experience has taught me that if he respects me then it will strengthen the relationship... so now if something is important to me I jump in and set a boundary and enforce it. My yfs seem to be responding to this very well. They know they can still playfully wrap me around their finger and that it means that I adore them... not that they can use me, and that I have no self-respect. It also makes them feel safer to know that there is a strong adult around when they need one.

I've made some big messes with yfs in the past myself... before I understood this. But I think if we act on fear of losing a yf we are actually more likely to increase the risk of losing them. Disrespect and resentment are poision to relationships.

Blessings
Cat.