|
Hi Chris, I'm not entirely sure how to answer the questions. I do feel OK about myself as a person, and, in fact, I generally "like" myself. I like how God has been shaping me through my life to be the person I am today. I'm nothing special by worldly standards -- or even Christian standards -- but I know that God loves me lots, and I believe He is pleased -- and that's really all that matters. How do I feel about being a BL? I'm OK with that, too. And even if nothing about that part of my life changes between now and the day I die, I'll still be OK with it. That being said, I don't believe God wants for me (or anyone else) to have these unhealthy sexual attractions, so, in that sense, I don't necessary "accept" this part of myself. It's difficult to describe. I "love" the fact that God has made me to be a sexual being. That is a fantastic gift! I wouldn't ever want to give that up. But, it's like the BL aspect of this otherwise-awesome sexual gift is an unwanted "brokenness" that is clinging to my sexuality. The fact that I am sexual IS part of my identity as a child of God ... but the BL aspect, to me, is not. I still accept that it's something I need to deal with -- and by God's grace I will -- but it's not something I accept as part of who I am at the most fundamental level. When all the "junk" is finally stripped away, I believe the sexual aspect of my BL attractions will be gone, too. I won't attempt to go into any further detail, because I have already opened up a huge can of worms. [Didn't mean to do that!] Anyway, I hope that makes some sense. I'm really not looking to get into a debate, so I'm just offering this for what it might be worth -- one guy's perspective. Blessings, Rainboy |