I must say Robert your argument is compelling. I cannot easily refute it.
I certainly have no cause to doubt the sincerity and integrity of your love for your partner.
It seems logical that there would be many same-sex partnerships that were in a healthier more loving state than many heterosexual marriages (of course the reverse would also be true).

I guess the problem I have with your view is that its focus is pragmatic. What works? What is loving? What makes people happy? What is the best use of ‘God given’ freedom? For what purpose has nature evolved us like this? How can we live to bring peace and joy to others?
Pragmatic questions are necessary and helpful, but I still think the issue of Holiness is relevant and must come first. Holiness sets boundaries pragmatism may (by human standards) morally or ethically cross quite comfortably.

Love is holiness. Yes it is. And we can justify our own definitions of love as much as we wish and have them take shelter under the “love is all the law and prophets” banner. However, Jesus did equate love with obedience to the commands of God and pointed out that many who call on the name of Christ will be cast out for practicing lawlessness. Now quite obviously, you believe that you ARE being obedient to the commands of God and if the Scriptures that mention same sex relationships really are only addressing the Canaanite excess of surrogacy or temple prostitution etc... then I would probably agree that you are.

I guess our fundamental difference is in how we take the interpretation of these passages. I don’t accept that surrogacy is the problem addressed in Romans 1. When Paul speaks of that which is ‘against nature’ I believe that he is talking about ‘created order’ in which God made woman for man such as it is presented in early Genesis. Similarly I take the passages in 1 Corinthians 6 and Timothy to be broader in scope than simply the particular homosexual practices of the religious cultures about them. I don’t intend to support or defend these positions. There is so much writing on these views (both quality and excessive I admit) in virtually any evangelical discussion of the texts, I hardly need to repeat it here (though perhaps these are the very issues relevant to our debate).

At the end of the day I think we won’t find disagreement on what constitutes a loving relationship between two people regardless of gender.
Our disagreement will center on how we take the New Testament passages referring to same sex relating. You feel confident that they are not addressing monogamous loving relationships. Others, myself included, believe they are broader in scope and cover all same gender sexual relating and are outside of the holiness of God.

I think that if we are honest we will admit that each other's interpretations could be correct.... or at least contain sufficient substance to be taken quite seriously. And then at the end of the day we will have to hold the position that our own convictions and study lead us to. Fortunately God’s grace is sufficient to cover the errors of those who sincerely seek to honor God and find themselves struggling with a sexuality that is (in my humble opinion) insufficiently addressed in Scripture to make our path clear.

Blessings
Cat.