You are both adults. You were stimulated and enjoyed it (and were obviously longing for it). A lot of guys your age (or maybe a bit younger) do the same sort of stuff - in fact these are often their first sexual experiences.

Though I know there are others here who disagree, I personally feel that you are at a critical point in deciding whether you will nurture and cultivate these feelings and experiences, reinforcing by that experimentation a pattern of learning intimacy with a guy rather a girl. Or whether you sit down and look at it all and decide that God’s desires are really for you to keep your deepest intimacy for a girl with whom you’ll spend (in every sense of the word) your life.

This could very well be for you a crossroads. I for one long so much that when I was your age having these feelings, there would have been someone I could thrash it all out with, like us guys you have here at cblf. But I didn’t, and it went on to be a lifetime of anguish for me.

You have a choice, bro - I believe, a VERY important one. Either to keep feeding this pattern of stimulation - and yes, it sure does feel good! - or to ‘keep yourself’ and look to your Dad and King for His leading to a lady who can be your soul-mate, and a life of true intimacy, rather than the false intimacy that can often come from basing a relationship on mutual hand-jobs.

Love ya, man! - and am praying with you as you think this all thru.