IN all of your posts, not once have I seen you mention prayer. For all the advice, don't count out God and prayer. You have been told by most everyone 1. back off. 2. Pray. The latter is the most important, for you and for them. My slogan is:

Do your best, let God do the rest.

That's the best advice I can give you. Pray, Pray, Pray. When you are cursed by temptation, confusion, speak out against it. That's how Jesus fought temptation in the desert. I think you are in a Sahara of your own.

Blessings,
Oliver