Hi Mason,

I will give you the same constructive analogy to sex I have given numerous times here and in my time in youth ministry.

You can't stand in the middle of a stair case. Sex is like stairs. You either go up the stairs, or down, all the way, but you can't stay half way down. You have a choice to make, and only you know how far down you are.

If you are only a few steps down, friends, and other loved ones can reach out an arm and pull you back up. If you are down, past your reach point, you risk going down all the way or flight back up to the top. In medicine practice, there is a saying called fight or flight.

You need to understand, that the farther down you go, the closer you are to the bottom, and when you go down all the way, it becomes much harder afterwards to climb back up. I mean, that when you participate in sexual activity, your body doesn't settle for less, and it becomes an addiction. That's what sex was designed for. Not only to be a love act between your partner, but also a bonding act that makes you want more and more--ideally with the one you will bond with for life. If you give that to the wrong person, you make it more difficult on yourself and your friend. He may discover this with another friend. He may risk going all the way down, but it is his risk and his choice.

Am I fair calling this a risk. Well, depends on whether, as you state, you are on the law's side--is the age of consent in your area 15 or older? Depends on your convictions and religious beliefs, of which, we seem to have a wide range on this board. You point out several scarios, one of which is negative. I don't know whether this is worth 50/50.

If you say no, you will still be, hopefully, in the same friendship you have always had. Maybe, then, he will begin to give you a more platonic love you claim you only wish to give him. Maybe that will be less tempting for you. I can promise, from the Bible, that God is aware of what you are capable of and won't let you go past that point if you are following Him.

1 Corinthians 10:13 (New International Version)
New International Version (NIV)

Copyright © 1973, 1978, 1984 by International Bible Society
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13No temptation has seized you except what is common to man. And God is faithful; he will not let you be tempted beyond what you can bear. But when you are tempted, he will also provide a way out so that you can stand up under it.

That said, don't go into this without God. Make sure you have His light with you as you take the stairs. It's dangerous to go down the stairs in the dark. Remember, no matter what, you are still His son. You are still our brother, and He will be triumphant in your life. Pray for that. Pray for this, and so will we. Remember, God loves you, and so do I!

Yours bro in Christ,
Oliver