Hey Chris.
I think you hinted me in your post as one BL who sleeps with his YF.

I guess other BL have different personal barriers that prevent them from doing such, but the affection I show him is absolutely harmless.

I explained in my last post about how my feelings differ depending on the age/maturity of the Boy/Guy.

I NEVER had any sexual thoughts at all when he was younger (He: 10, Me: 14), it was only simple adoration; he was looking for an older role model to show him affection.
During this time I was struggling with sexual Identity and wasn't sure who I was or what I liked.

Now that he is older and maturing (He:14, Me:18),I am discovering my feelings towards guys, and it is tempting to show sexual feelings towards him.
I honestly don't know how I restrain myself, he is beautiful.
I know I never could do anything sexual, unless he wanted to.
Fortunately it SEEMS that he is Straight, but it doesn't stop him from visiting.

Over the last year or so, my YF has slept with me on a couple of occasions.
I've noticed that some people here make it out as something serious, but it really isn't that big of a deal for me or him.
I think it is because of the age difference mainly, and so I avoid the Pedophile stereotype because I am young.

I always have his bed made if he changes his mind, but usually he just enjoys curling up in my arms and drifting off to sleep under the blankets.
He likes it when I stroke his hair and face;
he enjoys physical affection a lot.

I believe the negative stereotype for BoyLovers has made some hesitant to be physically close to their YFs.
But only the BoyLover knows his intentions initially, and he knows in himself that he could never harm his YF.

I hate men who have selfishly sexualized children with no regard to their feelings, only their own.

I've learned that BoyLove is much different from Pedophilia, even though both words mean the same.
Each word represents a group.
For me:

Pedophilia refers to plain sexual contact with Children.
BoyLove is Sexual Feelings, repressed by Love.

**********

Another thing before I go.
Chris, how did you feel when you discovered your YF having sex with a girl?

I couldn't bear having them do that above me, it would hurt too much.

I gave my YF Condoms because I wanted him to be safe, BUT it ended up encouraging him to start sex very young with his girlfriend (13).

I feel very worried for both of them, but theres nothing I can do to stop them now that they have started it.

Every time I hear of things they are doing, a part of me dies.
I can't think about it, without becoming very frustrated and angry; at both myself and his girlfriend.

I think about these feelings all the time, and I cannot decide whether I am angry:

1- Because I had little sexual contact with girls myself.

2- Because I wanted him to be mine, and she took him away from me with sex.

3- Because He found another way to achieve affection without me.

4- Because He is Straight.

They are selfish, I know.

But when he is with me, I give everything I have to make him happy and keep him.
When he is away from me, I give everything I have to get him back.

We both share affection; but unlike him, I have no-one when we part.
Thats is why I am obsessed with him.

**********

I'll be posting an summary of the last week or so soon.
I don't think I have ever felt so loved as I did last weekend!