Well, I am going to respond in part by plundering another short piece I wrote for another site. Basically your YF relationship here comes under the label "persuadable," and since it didn't involve any sex per se, to me it is on fairly solid ethical ground, though I know many would disagree (and I am interested in their viewpoints of course). Since there was a lot of love exchanged seemingly to the benefit of all, I would guess you are right about God being involved or at least in approval. But I don't know the whole story and the part where he leaves without telling you where he's gone is a little jarring.

This was in response to a Christian questioner (a BL it turned out, but we didn't know that at the time) who asked "what do you think of "grooming."

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"Grooming" is one of those loaded terms like "ring" (as in "pedophile ring") that was carried over from old-style persecutions of gays into the current anti-pedophile hater movement. It is a purpose-built propaganda term that has no neutral meaning.

As propaganda, it means to subtly bend a person's will so that they will do what you, the evil sexual manipulator, want.

Here is the Robert-I taxonomy of pedophile ethics (though you have to bear in mind that all taxonomies involving people are only crude approximations). There are 5 kinds of pedophiles in terms of ethics, starting with the worst: lunatic, aggressive, persuasive, persuadable and abstinent. Lunatic we all know about from the newspapers, people who put kids in dungeons and so on. Aggressive will do just about anything short of that to get into kids' pants or to get pics or webcam sequences over the internet. Persuasive can be very pleasant but they will introduce ideas to kids that the kids themselves do not have, and essentially try to normalize sexual activity with them as a new topic for kids they interact with. This is what the term "grooming" is trying to get at. Persuadable do not do this but if the kids themselves take the initiative every step of the way, they will slowly allow themselves to be changed from friendly to affectionate to intimate (hugging, kissing, sleeping together) and, in a few cases, to sexual. Or, in the teen case, if a teen has a crush and strongly requests to be their boyfriend, they will may yes right away or will ultimately give in after resisting for some time. Abstinent will not do anything sexual with a child (including teens under 18, who are ever less child-like as they mature) no matter what. A subcategory is people like me who are circumstantially abstinent because they have an adult boyfriend (or girlfriend or wife) and are monogamous. Other people are single but are abstinent on principle.

The majority of little boy lovers are abstinent; persuadable are not uncommon, though, but probably only a minority of them have ever actually had the experience of being persuaded. When they are, the persuasion generally stops at the point of hugging and kissing; I know one person whose 7-year-old young friend said "you can do whatever you like with me," but he nonetheless decided that to become sexual would not be right.

As far as persuasion goes, I have met one person who was persuasive in his youth (late teens) but has now given it up. The problem with persuasiveness or "grooming," of course, is that you will almost always have a kid who is fundamentally uninterested, probably a future heterosexual, but even if not, someone who has a high likelihood of feeling horrified and violated later on. Most boylovers were not interested in older people when they were young (though there are many exceptions too) so they understand very well how bad it may feel to have unwanted sexual attention from someone older. I myself found boys even one year older than myself repulsive. However, circa 1% of boys are differentiated as gay androphiles (lovers of significantly older boys and men) at the normal age for such differentiations. They may find themselves having crushes on older boys or men from a very early age -- though of course, the nature of what a crush is for them depends on their age.

Aggressive and lunatic as well as most persuasives are unacculturated and you will not find them on BL boards. Even if they did show up, they would be barred by house rules from saying anything about their activities.