Well I read a really long description of what a boylover was on some website one time and it seemed to fit me perfectly. I don't think being a boylover is a bad thing I mean it's clearly different than being a pedophile, I used to think I was one of those until I looked up online the diagnosis for a pedophile and I was like, okay that's really not me, nevermind. Pedophile is an extremely hurtful word to me. One of the only times in my entire life that I lost control of my anger was when I was at the hospital already suffering a great deal and the nurse who I was trying to explain my crisis to basically called me a pedophile and I jumped out of my chair and screamed in her face, and although I did not lay a finger on her they said that I "lunged" at her and so a fat security guard jumped me to the ground and then I got had my arms and legs locked to the bed in restraints. While in that situation I praised God for his holyness and I think I was humming or singing Jesus Loves Me... When I finally got home I wrote a beautiful arrangement of Jesus Loves Me for piano violin and cello and it turned out to be one of the most moving songs I've written so far.