I remember one kid who I had particular feelings for at school when he was 12 or so and I was 16. I lost contact with him soon after leaving school and the next thing I heard of him was on the news 4 years later - he'd died of a brain haemorrhage. (They reckoned it was caused by headbanging at metal gigs, hence it made national news.)

I've felt the everythinglessness, del - even though I hadn't seen the guy for nearly 4 years and didn't feel we were close I was in shock for days with no-one to turn to. There's nothing to say by way of consolation for your situation, so all I can do is weep with you and pray you'll all be through it with as little heartache as it allows, which is still a lot, I know.

Take care

EMPIRE