Cat,

I think it is a happy medium...as in..you do not want to give up who you are, but you need to be based in reality as well. I mean, I am not sure the situation you are in, but I am sure it is very possible to have fun with these boys and still show your adult responsibilities with them. Its one thing to know you are an adult and enjoy your time with your boys, and another thing to act or think like you are them. As far as your sexuality goes, I think it is doubtful that this has anything to do with it..and it is probably these people coming up with rationalizations as to who you are and why you are.