Wow, yeah, stuff like that is the sprinkles on the icing of the cake.

I love what you said, "I don’t know why that is, but you know, I’m glad for it. I really don’t want to think about him in any way that is sexual. I want to have him in my heart as someone I love with a love that I believe God would approve of. He is a beautiful boy and I want to always feel that I can be someone he can look up to."

I think this is exactly what God intended for all BL's. It seems clear that our nature is not a choice, but just how we were designed. I'm convinced that we were created this way to use for good. Satan takes the things like this that are so good and so pure and uses it for evil. God invented beauty. God invented boys. In Genesis He looked on His creation and said "It is good".

I really appreciate the maturity you demonstrated when you said, "Now I know “J” will never be a YF like my “L” was. He and his father have a wonderful relationship and he doesn’t need someone like me to be that involved with him. Not as involved as I was with “L”. But that’s ok, I don’t mind. I’m just happy to at last be someone he likes and knows he can talk to. We might not ever have another long conversation like that again, either….or maybe we will, who knows?". Too many BL's would force the relationship.