Hey Cat!
I know that you can make it through. We all go through those tough and hard times (and you definitely don't appear to be a stranger to those), but I know God will help you make it through this. Just think of everyone else - what it would do to them! Like you said, you are loved! Probably by more people that you even realize. If you get a chance, maybe take a Sunday afternoon off and just by yourself go someplace peaceful and reflect on all the great things around you. And hey - while going up and being with the Father is the total ultimate, maybe share your wonderful self with the people down here a little more. Its appreciated more than you know!

Graces of God,
Deliverance