After 18 years of marriage.... of focusing on my wife during orgasms... either during acutal sex with her or during my own masturbation.... I know that this is just NOT MY EXPERIENCE.

I wish it were true.... I can see the headlines now:
MASTERBATION: MIRACLE CURE FOR ALTERNATIVE SEXUALITY.

but alas.... [Cat just hangs his head.... ]

Actually my experience is the other way around.... what I think about determines if I can even HAVE an orgasm.

Cat.