I love the references to one of my favorite stories, by the way.

You know I spent most of my day at work today trying to think of something to say to you. Ten hours worth of pondering over your latest perils. I gotta be honest with you, it almost gave me a headache. So your wife has had it with you, is kicking you out, and in the midst of it all, you have fallen madly in love with a wonderful ten year old boy, huh? You know what? With some people when it rains, it pours...with you it's more like a monsoon.

I guess first of all I wouldn't feel too doggone guilty about this, if I were you. Didn't your wife know that you were a BL when you married her? I think I remember you saying that. Maybe she didn't know ALL of what she has gotten herself into, but she did marry you for better or for worse. I don't ever recall you saying that you have tried to hide anything from her. You know, with as messed up as my parent's marriage was, the at least hung in there until we were all old enough to move out of the house. And believe me bro, THEY had a messed up, rotten marriage if ever there was one. My mom was an active alcoholic and was fooling around on my dad. And my dad would find out about it and beat the crap out of her. All in front of three innocent young boys. To tell you the truth, I think things would have been better if they had gotten a divorse when I was young. But they decided to stay married until the kids (my brothers and I) were old enough to move out. I know it wasn't easy on either of thier parts...it sure wasn't easy on any of us kids.

But how you have described your relationship with your wife, I can see some possable hope there. I might be wrong because I am absolutely no expert at this kind of thing, but maybe there is. But I wouldn't put the whole problem on your own head if I were you. It does take two to make a marraige work. The fact that you are a BL might be a big pill for her to swallow, but she DID marry you knowing that you are one. I think she owes you a lot more credit for being a good husband and father than she is giving you.

Anyway, I have run out of time. I am praying for you, brother!

Love,
Chris