Your wife will not see you as a friend if you are not also her lover. And there's nothing wrong about her wanting this from you. Love produces fruit. If she sees very little to none, she will doubt your love for her and always question it. The things you are passionate about will be shown by the fruit that you bear out of that passion. And lustful passion does not produce the same kind of fruit as someone who truly loves and care for another. Your lustful attraction (i.e. vain imaginations) for boys is not a good thing (Matthew 5:28); certainly not in comparison to the love your wife has for you. Don't set yourself up for a fall or a lifetime full of regret. When I say this, I refer to the relationship with your wife. A boy could not possibly give you the same kind of love. Your wife has made a vow to be with you for life. A boy becomes a man and moves onto other things. To follow after boys is to chase after rainbows. And don't expect your wife's patience to last forever. You, not her, need to realize the realities, yea even consquences, of your attractions (1 Chronicles 28:9).

Jace