Hey Youth!
Well, you know from before that i have generally been jealous of your relationships with boys, as I am much more (even overly so) cautious with my relationships with boys, which results in not much of one at all. But what I will say in the following post is not being said out of jealousy, but is being dictated by the bagillion alarm bells going off in my head as I read your post (and your response to it).

First of all - for yourself and for the mods - [edit] and should not be mentioned on this board (see posting rules) and I would suggest be edited out. As much as I am hoping the best for you, doing things like that can get you into a lot of trouble (not to mention many posters here know who you are due to previous careless posting that has thankfully since been edited out). Personally, I don't think a kid should ever have to scream at you in anger to get you to stop doing something! [edit] He’s a kid. You are a BLer and almost an adult (but in this relationship you are the adult). You have to be the one setting up the boundaries that will protect both the child and yourself. Really, if you are in jail because of societal standards, it really doesn’t matter if it was all out of love.

And think about the future. What is going to be going through this kid’s head in 5 or 10 years? “WTF! I was friends with a PEDOPHILE! [edit] I’m going to sue his a** and throw it in jail and hate him forever for taking advantage of me!” He might not think that at all, and I am not one to endorse living on the “what if”’s, but I think this is one What If that can’t be ignored. Sometimes you have to forget about the passion of the moment and think about what is best in the long run for the both of you, regarding both the relationship and your separate lives. Can you have a really close relationship without [edit] or doing questionable things? It might be harder, but I am pretty sure it is possible!

I just can’t ignore the fact that I think your relationship is moving way too fast. Its on fire. And that means that there is the potential for someone to get burnt - badly. For you, it could result in jail time. For him, it could result in a misconception of older males and his own sexuality and could ultimately haunt him for the rest of his life.

IMPORTANT: This is all my opinion, so don’t take it too judgmental. But it is an informed opinion. This is beginning to sound like the relationship that I used to have with my cousin, and I (being the younger one) hated it! I loved my cousin (and still do), but he totally took advantage of me. Every chance he got he was trying to sneak a peak or go for the grab or do something else, and I HATED IT. But never so much as to scream at him, which raises even more flags. I still love my cousin, but I will never forget what he has done to me (nothing like rape me or anything, just pretty much what Youth has been describing) and it has really hindered our future relationship. Something is wrong in your relationship and if you don’t sort someone, or both of you, is going to get hurt and it isn’t the hurt that goes away over night. And like I said, maybe in 10 years his love for you goes away and he decides to take you a** to the cleaners. You don’t have to be as cautious as I am, but be a little cautious (and from what I have understood of your posts so far, everything has been run off of animal instinct and THE BOY is the one who is putting up the barriers).

And I know you said that you were never really alone, but if everyone is away or asleep, well, you’re alone. If you can get away with checking out his stuff,[edit] then you are alone. And be really careful with that (assumedly) older brother of his. I know if I suspected ANYTHING in a relationship like that with a younger brother, I would break that guy’s body (who I don’t know much about other than he’s putting the moves on my little brother) quicker that he knew what hit him (going back to the “would you let another BL be with your kids” issue that was raised a while ago).

Listen, you already said that you almost got yourself into a lot of trouble. Well, it seems like everything worked out, but keeping up your risky behavior isn’t going to help. I assume if you almost got into trouble, then someone has some suspicions – suspicions that aren’t being lessened by your current actions. I like ya and think you really are a great friend to the boys you are with, but you won’t be doing yourself any good behind bars or as a publicized pedophile.

Please, just for a little bit, be a little more restrained and cautious. Do things with the kid that builds on your friendship and not the relationship (I have some really great friends who would do anything for me and I would do anything for them, but none of them are concerned about my gym short selection).

Oh, and about you being the kids best friend. Sure – it makes you feel nice and warm and fuzzy on the inside. But to get through life he is going to need some other friends. So, why not take him and some of his not-so-close friends out and do something fun. Its win/win. You get to spend time with even more boys, and your yf gets to do stuff with kids his own age in an environment that he feels comfortable in (unless you screwed that up, as from what I gather he feels comfortable around you), thus building his relationship with kids his own age. And even if those friends change, the interpersonal skills gained by having those friends will benefit him for the rest of his life. Life as a BLer is tough, because as good as it feels to have everything directed to us and our needs, a lot of the time we need to be worried about the future needs of our yf – which sometimes means doing things that aren’t 100% advantageous to yourself, but is for him.

Sorry if it seemed like I freaked out at you at the beginning there, but reading those two posts really scared me. Maybe I’m tainted by my past experiences, but man, that was like a flash back. A flash back that no one should have – and if you can prevent such a flash back from occurring in that kids life, I think you should do everything if your power to do so.

Graces of God,
Deliverance

[Deliverance, I edited your post to take out the parts that directly describe the parts that got edited out of Youths' posts. Godspell]